• Ben Banbury

Your Goal Should Be Confidence & Happiness

A lot of people set unrealistic fitness goals that knock their self-esteem and batter their confidence. This post will help you set realistic fitness goals and will show you why you shouldn't be so damn hard on yourself!

Women in bikini on a beautiful beach
I used this photo to prove a point


Right from the word go I'm going to have a lil crack at social media, especially Instagram

Now I quite like IG, Facebook and Youtube. I think they're revolutionary and a HUGE asset to my business, but they have their downsides

On Instagram everyone's a model. Everyone's half-naked, photoshopped, spray-tanned and drives a Mercedes G-wagon

As we scroll through our newsfeed and see all these stunners posing on beaches in Bali or eating smoothie bowls, we instantly say to ourselves:

"Why don't I look like that?"

"Why isn't that me?"

I use Instagram girls as an example, but we all do it

Hey, look at me. As a small business owner, I follow a lot of personal trainer mentors and entrepreneurs and I'm forever seeing headlines like "my client Mathew made 22.4k in sales last month" or "After just 6 months, my client Claire bought her third gym"

"Why isn't that me?" I say to myself

This headspace is a dangerous place to be in. Constantly seeing images like this can destroy your mindset if you allow it

So, ladies, right from the word go I want you to stop looking at these women and thinking less of yourself


Secondly, I want you to really think hard about what your fitness goal is

I've had so many people approach me with the intention of getting super lean, Hollywood toned and a stomach like so-and-so from Instagram

But are these goals actually realistic?

I mean for one, the women you see on Instagram don't actually look like the women you see on Instagram

Cheap apps and simple camera lighting can do amazing things for someone's appearance in a photo

I hate to break it to you, but your "Instagram crush" won't look like that in person

What you see in photos is a teeny tiny snapshot of the whole story

What you won't see often are the stretch marks, cellulite or unshaved legs

Hey, it's no difference to the Mc Donalds burger ads and the real deal!

And hey, there's ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong with the burger on the right! I'm still salivating slightly

All I'm saying is don't set goals that are impossible to attain (:

And try and follow the accounts where the influencer is being as genuine and transparent as possible. The @thefoodmedic is the first one that pings to mind


Finally ladies, I just want to try and help you create realistic and attainable fitness goals

I want you to imagine for a moment a Risk board. You've got your territories and your little men all ready to place on your countries

As you're scanning the board you want to place as many troops in areas that are most important to you. So you start placing lots in Australia and South America

After you've hit the main territories you start popping the odd man in Nepal and Madagascar for shits and gigs and to try and wind up your partner who's obviously trying to take Africa

(You can see I played a lot of Risk over the Christmas holidays)

Now I want you to imagine that that Risk board is your life, each of those troops signifies one hour of your day and each territory is one of your weekly commitments